Monday, November 17, 2008

We won!

I want to thank all the supporters whose tireless hard work led to this landmark victory for President-Elect Williams! They said it couldn't be done, but thanks to your hard work and tireless support, we've achieved something truly historic; something that will be remembered for years as an inspiring victory for the forces of--


...but I thought...

...he LOOKS...'re telling me there were TWO of them...?

...but I thought...

...I mean, how can you tell? Don't they mostly look...

...not even on the ballot...?

...oh, forget it.

Monday, September 1, 2008

It's not too late!

Obviously, this McCain thing isn't really working out, so let's work HARDER THAN EVER to get him retired and Williams chosen as his replacement. Remember our motto that I just made up: What About Wally?

Monday, February 5, 2007

Important Walter Williams information the LIBERAL MEDIA doesn't want you to know!

Well, he once killed a man with a guitar string. He's been seen at the table with kings. Well, he once saved a baby from drowning. There are those who say beneath his coat--there are wings.

Awesome reasons to vote for Wally

He thinks environmentalists are all secretly Stalinists and/or Nazis:

"The environmental extremists' true agenda has little or nothing to do with climate change. Their true agenda is to find a means to control our lives. The kind of repressive human control, not to mention government-sanctioned mass murder, seen under communism has lost any measure of intellectual respectability. So people who want that kind of control must come up with a new name, and that new name is environmentalism.">He's against "diversity" on principle. It's good to have principles.

"What's part of Williams' solution? Benefactors should stop giving money to universities that engage in racist diversity policy. Simply go to the university's website, and if you find offices of diversity, close your pocketbook. There's nothing like the sound of pocketbooks snapping shut to open the closed minds of administrators."

He thinks that if you're sick or starving to death and you don't have money, you should just fucking DIE, you parasite! You're RUINING SOCIETY!

"Three-fifths to two-thirds of the federal budget consists of taking property from one American and giving it to another. Were a private person to do the same thing, we'd call it theft. When government does it, we euphemistically call it income redistribution, but that's exactly what thieves do -- redistribute income. Income redistribution not only betrays the founders' vision, it's a sin in the eyes of God. I'm guessing that when God gave Moses the Eighth Commandment, 'Thou shalt not steal,' I'm sure he didn't mean 'thou shalt not steal unless there was a majority vote in Congress.'"

No word from Williams on what he meant when he said "inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me."

He thinks that Africa can go fuck itself.

"The best thing westerners can do for Africa is to keep their money and their economic development 'experts.'"

He thinks that those darn negroes vote for Democrats 'cause they're so whiny.

"That power will be gone the very day that a significant number of blacks cease to be a people of grievance. This is potentially a Republican advantage. The Democrats and the liberal establishment know that, which is why they vilify high-profile blacks who aren't filled with resentment and grievance."

He bemoans the fact that we're unwilling to turn the Middle East into a radioactive pit.

"Think about it. Currently, the U.S. has an arsenal of 18 Ohio class submarines. Just one submarine is loaded with 24 Trident nuclear missiles. Each Trident missile has eight nuclear warheads capable of being independently targeted. That means the U.S. alone has the capacity to wipe out Iran, Syria or any other state that supports terrorist groups or engages in terrorism -- without risking the life of a single soldier. Terrorist supporters know we have this capacity, but because of worldwide public opinion, which often appears to be on their side, coupled with our weak will, we'll never use it."

If Reagan could use "Born in the USA," perhaps Williams could use The Cure's "Killing an Arab" as his campaign's theme song.

He believes in the right of prima nocti.

...okay, I made that one up. But you have to admit: I've clearly demonstrated it fits in with his general character.

All in all, you can see why a self-professed Christian like Tinsley wants this guy to be President. I suspect, though, that he might have a problem: we Americans may be selfish sumbitches, but I'm sorta thinking that even we may be uncomfortable with the blatant fuck the poor/I hate black people/nuke the a-rabs rhetoric. I mean, not the Republican base, certainly, but the people whose votes he'd need in the general.

Hi everyone.

I created this webblog because I am in the thrall of cartoon waterfowl. God willing, Tinsley will see this and use it in a comic as just one more piece of evidence for the enormous tsunami of pro-Williams momentum he's created. Please post many pro-Williams arguments in comments.